Showing posts with label fatherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fatherhood. Show all posts

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Fatherhod : An unparalleled emotion

What happens when a young one comes into this world.

When she opens her eyes for the first time and finds herself being cradled in someone's arms with a gaggle of doting people around her.

She looks confused. She is quiet. She looks so vulnerable. She at times make you feel sorry for her. She makes you want to just put barriers around her. For her protection.

She makes you nervous because of her feebleness. Heck she even makes you afraid of touching her yourself because of that.

Then you grow out of that phase. You begin to get confident about the whole thing. You begin to hold her, cuddle her, walk in the room with her on your shoulder. You begin to talk a lot of cute nonsense to her and make faces at her. You begin to start telling your plans about her ... to her. You know that she does not understand a single word of what you are saying, but thats just a way of you pouring out your feelings.

Mind you, it does not strike you when you see her for the first time. It just grows on you and you start to look for her and miss her when she is not around. You put her best photograph on your computer's desktop. You want to talk about her in every discussion. You celebrate and every new action, behavior, stunt (if I may say so) from her. You discard logic when interpreting her actions and in talking to her.

Wow... just three months... and so much. What will happen when she will start her cackling. Fatherhood has been some experience so far.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

The Day - 2nd March. Aadyaa's arrival.

The day started with wifey reporting that her water has broken. The baby seems to be on the way... two weeks earlier than predicted by the gynecologist. The gynae confirmed it after inspection and wifey was admitted to the hospital. So from the initial plan of leisurely spending the Sunday watching the first of the India - Australia cricket finals, the scenario changed to hectic activity in the hospital and nervousness. Now when I think of it, the match that day provided moments of relief from the pressure to me and the others who were present.

There was a scene right out of "Nine Months" movie when in one of the moments when I tried to comfort wifey during a painful contraction in the evening, she shooed me away saying 'हट जाओ । भाग जाओ ।' :-) lol

Finally the call came from the gynae to take wifey to labor room at around 9.15 pm.

Once wifey was in the labor room, did I realise I was hungry ... and tired. I went to the hospital room, switched on the TV and tried to eat some dinner... The TV was full of news of the cricket victory over Aussies in the first final. An hour passed. I remembered the gynae telling us that it could take an hour or more. The 38 week wait is going to get over anytime. came back to wait outside the labor room. Prachi and my mothers and one of her brothers were present. The rest of the family had been sent home.

More than an hour passed. Apart from the tension of waiting and hoping for everything to be fine, I was in another fix... what to name the kid. Girl's name was decided 3 months back. And the name was so liked by wifey and me that we just did not think about a name in the eventuality of the baby being a boy.

Finally someone emerged from the labor room and asked for cloth to wrap the baby in as the baby had arrived. Our barrage of questions were not answered by him and he disappeared after getting the cloth and a shawl from my mother. I was congratulated and hugged by wifeys brother and all four of us went into a huddle. After another agonising 15 minutes or so, the baby emerged, wrapped in the shawl and we were informed that its a girl. Oh Man !!! Finally I get to see my offspring.

My Offspring!

She was taken up to the hospital room and wifey's brother and I returned to wait for and receive wifey. All this in the middle of frantic texting and making and receiving phone calls. Wifey came out and in discomfort, but was looking ok overall.

It actually began to sink in from the next morning that we had hoped for a girl and got her. God had been kind. So we found the name which the two of us had decided for her to be extremely appropriate - Aadyaa, after Goddess Durga.

Three months earlier I had decided in my mind the text message which I was going to send to the rest of the world when she arrives. Yes. The exact words were in my mind months before. So I was well prepared when the moment came :-)

Since then it has been a roller coaster so far for me, feeling peaceful and happy when she is quiet, seems comforted in my arms and goes to sleep at my shoulder... and feeling extremely disturbed when she is crying out loud.

This is not as perfect a description as I would have liked to put out, but that is because of the time which has passed. And in the ensuing time, I have preferred to be with Aadyaa rather than spend the time putting out this post. I will possibly edit it in the course of the next few days and add more details as I remember them.